Girlfriends see their men in a different way than other people get to see. We hold the secrets that no one else knows past the relationship expiration date, we're one of the first people to see them cry, some of us even take it a bit further and do things that we probably still to this day wont ever speak of just to keep them happy and out of trouble. The ride or die's. We see the young man that is weak from all the obstacles life has thrown at us, you know, the young man that walks through that door and slides with his back against the wall, bottom to the floor, and hands covering his face. The defeated young man. We see the young man that keeps it together in front of his parents and family members, but cries to you because someone just passed in his family because he knows that you're the one person that he could cry to. We see the young man that is overwhelmed with college, per sae, so we might make it a bit easier by "tweaking" his assignments so that he can relax. We see.... the young man that experiences some failings and maybe sexual shortcomings, but we never tell a soul or hold it over his head because we want our men to keep their pride. Us girlfriends are slept on and unappreciated for the simple fact that we hold all the secrets and build the man that you see, today. We dim down our lights a lot of times, just because it might just be in our natures, in order for these "boyfriends" of ours to get ahead and be somebody. We kick our own asses to the curb and sweep aside our own personal wants and needs in order for these men to be good, when everything should be mutual. Some of us even pretend to be weak the whole time just because he wouldn't dare appreciate it if you were actually stronger than him. When in actuality, we might not be physically, but in all other categories.... we are. There are still some things that I would take to my grave for my ex, which I think a few women could relate to... but I think the most painful thing for most women to go through if that relationship were to end is... when that same insecure and defeated young man all of a sudden appears to be confident and strong and dismiss everything that you done or went through in order for him to get there. Not only that, but all the things you tried to instill in that same insecure and defeated young man all of a sudden becomes present for the next woman and she did not endure all that you did for him to get there. She did not have the late night tears after watching him fall asleep because he just did something stupid and tried to blame it on his parent's divorce just to get a pass... and you lay there watching him sleep peacefully after forgiving him for the millionth time. She did not stay on his head about his academics because all he wanted to do was fool around and expect college to be easy. She did not take the yelling and slight physical altercations because he was just so damn frustrated and took his problems out on you. And... all of a sudden he gets it together, but it isn't for you. Being a girlfriend is more than just a title.... because I have yet to become a mother, but I played mother, too. I played mother, counselor, cheerleader, the mud underneath his shoes, victim, weak.... are you following me? So, when I meet a new guy and he talks about his past and says that "All my ex's left me..." I think about this. Because I'm pretty sure my ex is out there spitting it the SAME EXACT WAY.
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