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Guilty For Doing The Right Thing...


Do not feel bad for removing toxicity. Simple sentence, simple message, appears to be a simple action, but this is easier said than done. There was this friend of mine that I just had to let go, and it was one of the best decisions that I could have ever made, legit. Have you ever had a "leech" in your life, better explained as a mosquito? That was him. A person that can never take responsibility for their actions, constantly changes stories, stays in the same place in life while you're trying to progress, just a negative spirit all the way around? A person that tries to attach themselves on your back all the way through the relationship while they just leech off of all you are and what you're doing... He was that person, that I just so happened to be talking to prior to the friendship, that was in love with me. See the complication. He had a way of calling me out of my name, disrespecting me, and turning into this evil person whenever things did not benefit him. When I moved on to someone that did not do those things and treated me well, he became spiteful. Outside of moving on relationship wise, I still tried to maintain a friendship. But, understand that it is hard to maintain effective relationships with people that are troubled. You see, he'd have these moments of anger, then turn around and talk about how he loved and cared for me and would make me feel responsible for
"fixing" him. I have this natural habit to fix people and I feel bad for leaving people behind when they need help, but at some point, I had to ask myself.. "What about me?"  This man was twenty-six years old, no car, nothing of his own, working at McDonalds asking me to fix him? I just started adulthood and I am still in the process of figuring out what exactly that means and he wants me to take on the responsibility for teaching him how to be a man? Because he wasn't one. I'm not a man, so how the hell can I teach him to be one? All these questions and concerns went through my head everyday we maintained a relationship and/or a friendship and I had to end it. I had to start worrying about me and not have one ounce of guilt for him because he was too grown to be relying on me. You cannot feel guilty for removing the poison from your life in order to keep your life clean. You are not responsible for fixing others and guiding people in the right direction all the time because, if you focus too much on them, what about you? People have to want to change and be better for themselves outside of the resources provided to them, and this man, was just a complication that I really could live without. He literally was the only one benefiting out of the relationship and friendship, so why was I trying so hard to keep it alive? Why would I feel guilty for removing him in order to keep progressing in my life? If anything, he should feel bad for taking advantage of and hurting a friend for his own personal gain. 
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