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Relationship Status.


I'm off the market. Not, "I'm talking to somebody, but I'm still technically single". Not, any, "I'm single, but not single-single." I am in a relationship. A lot of you have been following my journey throughout my last breakup, along with the experiences that I have had being single, so this change in my life is slightly important to me. Since September, I have had the opportunity to experience a lot of men coming my way, and I have had about two that I considered a relationship with. The last situation did not work because he had too much baggage, but this one I decided to finally jump on the ledge a little bit with. He's older, has some tweaking needed here and there, but who doesn't? The thing that made him stand out to me the most was that... we can have fun and share laughs together in a sense where we are best friends. We can play around without it being a relationship type of thing, which means that I can have a friend in him outside of him being my partner. Not only that, but I have had to tell a lot of dudes about putting relationship boundaries on our situations while we were never in a relationship... and I had to have that same conversation with him. The only difference is, with that being said, he decided to actually put me in a relationship, therefore, here we are. "For My Beautiful Ladies" and "So You Said You Wanted To Take Me On A Date?" were two of my very early blogs that talked about my experiences with being single early on. I talked about my pain in plenty of blogs, as well, and the beautiful thing about writing this blog here today is reading back on all of those and seeing how the pain was fresh after the cut, maneuvering through it, and the aftermath of it. I am here, now, healed and prepared to take on a completely different life plan with a completely different partner with completely different intentions. I didn't imagine having kids with another man than my first, or even sharing my body with anyone else but my first, but what I grew to understand was that life happens. No matter how bad we might want things to work because we invested so much time in it, that may not be how God wants it to work, and I like to think that the relationship failed in order for me to learn to love myself again, and in return, be someone better for someone else. And, he was hurt once upon a time, too, and being prepared to be with someone else, which I hope is me. I have matured enough in my dating to accept when things do and do not work, and even though I have hopes and prayers for this one to succeed, I will be okay if it does not. I used to be the one so wrapped up in relationships and making my life all about my relationship, and as I am out of that and watching my friends become who I was, I try my hardest to not be like that again. I will do things different with this one, and above all, not lose myself and the love and respect that I have for myself in order to feed his ego or to make him happy. We lose sight in relationships, the unselfish ones, that we have to be happy, too... and, that is one of my main goals. I'm not even scared with this one, either, because he keeps it so honest with me. And, I find comfort in his age and where he is in life as well because I'm sure he's tired of bouncing around from woman to woman and this is his time to settle down. I don't really care what anyone thinks when they look at me and him, or assume about me and him, because my relationships are my business. Whatever and whoever makes me happy always has a space in my life, and it will always be that way. If he can make me laugh at any given moment, make me smile just by staring at me, cause me to have fun just sitting up watching basketball, and look good on my arms in addition to always being honest with me no matter how it will make me feel.... I wanna keep it. I wanna keep it, and I wanna hold on to it, and I want to water this plant and leave it in the sun and come out everyday to see just how much it can grow. 

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