Skip to main content

Three Months: The Key Dating Time Frame


I set deadlines for the new men that come into my life trying to get with me. What I mean is, I give myself a certain amount of time to get to know someone and see their good and bad, in order to determine whether or not I want to spend more time of my life with that person. I gave someone up until the end of this month to get over expressing his emotions and for him to simply tell me how he felt about me without me having to guess about it and... can I really be sit up shocked as I tell yall that there was no improvements over the course of three months time. He gets no more time in my life by the end of this month if things do not change. You see, when I meet someone, I tell them that it will not take me another 4 1/2 years to determine whether or not something is good or bad for me. You get three months to show me SOMETHING that is worth staying for. Three months of this "get to know you" stage. Three months of... "let me see your beautiful and ugly" and then I move forward and attempt to take you seriously, or I move on and try again? My uncle tells me all the time to not take any of the guys I express interest in seriously unless they SHOW me that they are serious. These three months are the time where I can see what a person is about, understand how they move, see how they handle everyday problems, and many other things. Over three months, people grow to be comfortable, which is how slip ups and mistakes come about. I have already made mistakes with my three months goal, yeah its a shocker that I am not perfect, lol... but, I still try. With these three months creeping up with this guy... I am coming to terms with the fact that, even though I am really into him, he is too dysfunctional to have anything like me in his life. He simply does not deserve me, no matter how bad I want him to change so that I can think otherwise. So, I ended up meeting someone else that I like and this three months period starts again. I check him out, I see the good, bad, and the ugly. I.... spend time with him and date him and see how the situation can grow if it does go up to three months and try again. I am no longer scared to try again because... my fairytale is out there doing the same thing I have been doing ... looking and preparing for me. With these three months, aside from these men... I am developing, changing, growing, and making mistakes, too. Its not even just about me, these men are checking me out too to see if I am what they really want. I love the idea of me setting up this time frame and establishing what it is and sticking with it because ... tomorrow is not guaranteed for me. And, if tomorrow is not guaranteed for me, I want to make sure that I spend my last days with people that are genuinely there for me. I want it to be spent with people that SEE me. People that love me/want to love me. People that.... want to do better and progress with me. People that..... do not cause me harm. I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out this dating thing and make it successful for me. 

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Most Popular Posts

Girl friendssssss !!!!

Girlfriends was by far one of the best television shows that I grew up watching, and still watch to this day... and when I think about the type of women/social circle that I would like to be around, Joan, Toni, Mya, and Lynn is exactly what it would look like. I remember starting off the sixth grade and traveling up until high school with a huge social circle filled with all these different types of girls and young women with varied personalities, values, and beliefs. Throughout that time, my social circle remained large, but there were some tweaks here and there and some people were not meant to last. What I mean is, we outgrow some relationships, we drain out some relationships, and we sometimes stop putting forth the effort to keep up effective relationships. Over the course of those years, I developed a lot of meaningful relationships and developed a slight sense of what type of people I wanted to be surrounded by. One of the major adjustments that I had throughout graduat
Post a Comment
Read more

Facebook Chronicles.

My post had over 250 comments and 18 shares as of writing this blog. So, all different types of men come in my dms messaging me with different purposes. I've gotten nudes in my messages, wanna-be thugs, nerds, mixtapes, drama, and all these other things in my messages, but today was the ultimate breaking point for me. This guy, who has been trying to get with me for years, came in my messages trying to talk to me, which I denied, and he in return got potty within the mouth and said some disrespectful things to me. There were a few reasons why I shared the messages on Facebook and Snapchat that I really want to share. For starters, there are right and wrong ways to approach women when you come in their direct messages. I don't know how other people were raised, but meeting and talking to people online is already something sketchy because you don't really have a sure perception of how this person is through something where we can be who we want to be. Behind computer scr
Post a Comment
Read more

How Do You Go About Letting People Go?

The past few days, people have been trying me, yet I have provided them with opportunities to change that. Today, I decided to take the initiative to cut off my "best friend" due to her no longer being fit to have that role anymore. Was the decision hard? Far from it. I say that... if you allow people the opportunity to come back into your life from a previous mishap, and they did not learn from it from not having you present in their life then, then they are not fit to be a part of your life. I do not grieve over losses of people in that manner anymore because I make decisions that are going to be best for me. If it is best for me to cut ties with people that I have known for years, so be it. Whether it is friends, family, whoever... because you will not have a place in my life where you choose to be toxic. We are not going to speak on the countless nights where you called and I was the only one there to talk to. We are not going to speak on how you questioned whether you w
Post a Comment
Read more