College Talk: Welcome to College!

I wish I had someone to talk to me about college before I entered it. Not my parents, because neither of them experienced it. Or, not even some peers that went to college before me that played around the whole time. I am talking about, someone with a similar mindset to mine, that struggled to balance having a social life, friendships and relationships, financial gains and losses, and many other things. I am talking about... someone that has been quiet for years and has always wanted to find the courage to step out of her shell and be apart of something bigger than herself, you know? Someone that can relate to me and give me insight as to what I should prepare for as I enter a new stage in life. Now, it is a bit too late for me now because I am about to get my first degree and walk into my second, but it isn't too late to have this conversation for all my younger family members walking into their first year of college. The conversation needs to be had. College is not your "walk in the park" like high school was. If you have any family members that attended college and was actually on their A-Game, they will tell you that there will be times where you want to give up and where you might have a class that you just might not feel like you can pass. That might not have been the case for you as a previous honors student in high school, because you THOUGHT those classes were difficult, but you managed, but …. college cannot compare. You see, you could've went nearly a week without studying in high school and pass your tests and quizzes, but that does not fly in college. Take advantage of the tutoring services that they provide, because you pay for those in your tuition. I had a tutor for all my science courses that I attended every week on the same day, at the same time, no exceptions because there was no other option but passing. Let me tell you something, one of the key pieces of advice to take with your classes is... the MOMENT you feel like you are struggling in a course, get a tutor and confide in your teacher about it. Because, the moment you think you got it... you could easily find yourself going from having an A in a class to a mid-C in the class. It happens. What about relationships? I went into college in a long-term relationship and chose the college I chose because of the person I was with and I recommend NOT attending the same college as your mate. My sister chose to avoid that advice and she will eventually have to learn the lessons that I learned about relationships in college, and that is a tough pill to swallow, but what I can do is use my voice to help others going into college. Dating the person you dated in high school, in college, is not easy because you know this person in their childish form, but you have yet to meet the person that goes through the obstacles of finding themselves and becoming adults. What I was not prepared for was the reality of... people have to change. The person you fell for in high school will not be the same person maybe a semester at the least and sophomore year at the most in college. They will evolve to handle their problems differently, there will be changes in confidence levels, emotional stability... hell, their life in general and its not something you can really prepare for. There will be pain at some point due to this upcoming change and your challenge along with balancing college is balancing college plus finding a way to not let that hurt interfere with the whole purpose behind you coming to college in the first place. Go into college realistic and understand that the friends and mate that you walked through those doors on the first day with, just might not be the same friends and mate that you walk out with. You might walk out alone. You might walk out with one friend. But, that is okay. Financial stability? You will grow in finances in college and you will fall, too. You can find yourself working your ass off day after day and taking on classes and being so tired, but you'll know when adulthood has kicked in when you recognized that you have to do what you have to do to handle your responsibilities. You wont call mom and dad week after week asking for money, because you recognize that life after college wont be that way. Take the opportunity to work during college and get a sense of what it is like to take care of yourself independently. You are supposed to be learning these things through college. The rest of your life will be about balancing a lot of responsibilities, so you might have to work and go to school. It is possible because people do it everyday. Now, I decided to not invest in a credit card throughout my time in college because I heard many stories about failures with them. I have learned to manage my money well with my new bills in place, so I am just now considering investing in a credit card since I am about to get out on my own in a year. If you choose to get a credit card, my best advice to you is to confide in someone with good credit first, and do your own research as well, before getting it.

More importantly, I want to talk about the importance of maintaining your focus in college. It is easy to go throughout the summer and tell all the people wishing you well that you will keep your head on straight in college, but the reality of it is, you will have moments where that is not the case. When you go to a party and sip on a little something or take a hit? You aren't being level-headed. When you take the time out to have an argument with your mate about something you heard and sit up and stress about it? You aren't focused. When you skip a class or two just because you can or lolly gag and don't take your assignments seriously, you simply are not focused. Do not skip class just because. I think people forget that they are spending thousands of dollars to go to school and it is a complete waste of money to pay for it and not attend class or take the assignments seriously. Growing up, my parents made me and my sister sit and read everyday and take time out to study... that habit traveled with me to college. You might be different and choose to go against what you were taught at home and that is the challenge. Practice self-discipline. There is so much to talk about when it comes to college and I do not want to go on and on about it, but you can use the search bar on my main page and type "college" and find all other important topics in other blogs to get further talk about it. All in all, my advice to you is to just go into college being realistic and smart. Thanks for the read and good luck on your upcoming semester!