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Showing posts from August, 2018

How Do You Go About Letting People Go?

The past few days, people have been trying me, yet I have provided them with opportunities to change that. Today, I decided to take the initiative to cut off my "best friend" due to her no longer being fit to have that role anymore. Was the decision hard? Far from it. I say that... if you allow people the opportunity to come back into your life from a previous mishap, and they did not learn from it from not having you present in their life then, then they are not fit to be a part of your life. I do not grieve over losses of people in that manner anymore because I make decisions that are going to be best for me. If it is best for me to cut ties with people that I have known for years, so be it. Whether it is friends, family, whoever... because you will not have a place in my life where you choose to be toxic. We are not going to speak on the countless nights where you called and I was the only one there to talk to. We are not going to speak on how you questioned whether you w

You My Baby, And You My Baby, Too....

One of the best parts about being single and all by my lonely is getting the opportunity to mingle with different people without expectations and explore different personalities. I am the single woman that will communicate with a few dudes at once, NO SEXUAL INTERACTION, and see where things can go. I don't think it is a bad thing to meet and communicate with multiple men while being single to see whether or not certain traits are what you like. Now, where things can get a bit sticky is when you want to get sexually involved, because …. if sleeping around is something that you desire, I highly recommend being discrete about it and being consistent with your health status and checkups. But anyways... there is nothing wrong with keeping your options open. There is nothing wrong with liking multiple people at once and going on a few dates here and there until you find something that you like. Because, let's say there is one man that you like because he is adventurous and ta

Facebook Topic: Leave A Message Without Mentioning Someone's Name...

Thanks for putting me into the position to grow up and become a woman. Without our time spent, the mistakes and sacrifices made, those heartbreaks... I wouldn't have the mindset that I have now. The moment I brought you around my parents and started going back and forth with them about you, they told me that I was naïve and did not understand the journey that you were about to put me through. I defended you for years, and in turn, they ended up right about you. It was not until that second heartbreak..... the staying up late waiting for you to communicate, the tears behind your cheating, the slap to your face behind the laughing at my pain, that I was forced to no longer live in this fantasy land that I did not even know that I was in. I realized that... when you are in love, better yet, loving someone more than yourself... you go blind. What is common sense to a regular person about how you should be treated and what is acceptable stops being clear. What I mean is... they can

Facebook Topic: What Is Preventing You From Being With Who You Really Want?

"What is preventing you from being with who you really want?" is a question I just saw on my Facebook page and I wanted to answer it. I, myself, is what is preventing me from being with the person I really want. If I am even sure this is the person that I want, I don't know. I stopped pursuing relationships a long time ago. I tell every dude that tries to establish something with me, that, I do not take anyone seriously until they show me that they are serious, and that is advice that I got from my father. I never listened to him about men before, but I have started to because he understands you creatures way more than me, lbs. With that being said, I don't settle down and focus on one person and I choose to keep my options open. I don't sleep around at all, but still, I mingle to see whether or not I want certain characteristics in a mate and I take the time to simply learn what men expect and want from women, and what I want from a man. I am.... not with th

College Talk: Welcome to College!

I wish I had someone to talk to me about college before I entered it. Not my parents, because neither of them experienced it. Or, not even some peers that went to college before me that played around the whole time. I am talking about, someone with a similar mindset to mine, that struggled to balance having a social life, friendships and relationships, financial gains and losses, and many other things. I am talking about... someone that has been quiet for years and has always wanted to find the courage to step out of her shell and be apart of something bigger than herself, you know? Someone that can relate to me and give me insight as to what I should prepare for as I enter a new stage in life. Now, it is a bit too late for me now because I am about to get my first degree and walk into my second, but it isn't too late to have this conversation for all my younger family members walking into their first year of college. The conversation needs to be had. College is not your "

Tatted.

There could have been an ending. There could have been a stop to my existence, a stop to my growth, a stop to my journey, a stop to my life.... I think about it everyday. I didn't think writing it down, typing it out, or anything else besides a tattoo that would be attached with me forever to remind me of how grateful I am to still have my life. Because, for a long time throughout my junior year of college, I didn't want it. I get to look at something this beautiful and symbolic every day for the rest of my life and I am in love with it. When I got this tattoo, it was not important for me to explain myself to people as to why I got this for the sake of "they don't understand its purpose". It is not about them. It is about me. The semicolon has a different meaning for each person that has it tatted on them, and I want to express the meaning behind mine.  Semicolon: "There could have been a possible ending, but there was not...." Semicolon: "

dreaming.

I keep my head in the clouds a lot of the time because I am in love with the idea of dreaming. I am amazed with the idea of fantasizing and creating my own destiny within a matter of seconds. I could be rich as soon as I close my eyes. I could have the perfect husband and kids, by my own definition, just by focusing on an object and daydreaming about it. Anything that I want to happen, or do not want to happen, can occur all in one sitting with closing my eyes one time and that is what makes the idea of dreaming beautiful. I grew up around a lot of people that had dreams, but did not necessarily get to follow them. These people made excuses and counted themselves out, basically doing everything to deprive themselves of getting the life that they always wanted. With my life, and the way that I go about making decisions in it, I would hope that people would be able to look at it and see that I was able to follow my dreams.... and in return, that will encourage other people to do the

How To Handle "New People"....

Anyone that has been around me for years understands how bad my anger once was, and how far I have come. Now, I didn't say that it's 100% better, but there has been some type of improvement. One of the things that I do not appreciate about people during first interactions is that, we put off this persona that we are perfect without flaws. Or, we downplay our flaws to be something tolerable, when we could very well know that we are troubled and/or toxic individuals. It's a selfish thing to do right off the bat, and it is something that I pay attention to. One of the things that I appreciate when I meet somebody is whether or not they take that door that I have open for them (through asking questions) and take the initiative to be honest and admit their own faults. I asked a guy yesterday why he was single, and he did not place blame on the other person, he was honest about it being him. Another guy once told me that he feared commitment, and I appreciated that honesty,

I'm 21.... Now What?

God spares my life over and over even after the countless amounts of unthought out and idiotic decisions that I make. I chose to take Saturday to be irresponsible and be drunk on my ass, knowing the possible outcomes of it all, and I was still spared. I am unsure how I got home, how I got home safe with no scratches or bruises, but I did. A lot of people can go out and consciously do something idiotic and get punished for it, yet my punishment for it all was only a day of throwing up. Do you know how many people go out and get drunk and lose their awareness, but are harmed? Not necessarily as punishment, but simply harmed due to their state of mind, the people around them, or their environment.... I keep getting spared and I am not really sure if it is appropriate to ask why. Some people can go out and get crazy drunk and get themselves killed. The reality of it is, I could have been raped by some guy around me... I could've collapsed in the middle of the street instead of in